Top 100 Reasons your persian....

1.) You refer to yourself as a Persian, not an Iranian.

2.) You refer to every other friend as Kooni or juunam.

3.)You have a fear of being deported.

4.) You refuse to drive anything but a BMW or Mercedes.

5.) You refer to a BMW as a BMVEH.

6.)You're always on the verge of trading in your Honda/Nissan for a Bimmer or Mercedes.

7.)You can't spell worth a shit.

8.)You have a friend that designs websites.

9.)You think Black Cats have talent.

10.)You live in the suburbs but claim DC.

11.)You keep a bottle of vodka in your freezer.

12.)You are studying to be a business, medical or international studies major.

13.)You only hang out in groups of 10 or more.

14.)Your wardrobe consists of black, black, and more black. (babak)

15.)You think your uni-brow is sexy. (ME)

16.)You celebrate when you receive your citizenship.

17.)You're neighbor wonders why you every Iranian in the world over to eat Kebab on Sundays.

18.)You wish Waffle House had "Nuun o Paneer" on the menu.

19.)You can't sleep before 3 AM.

20.)You participate or organize drunk girls to strip.

21.)You can actually justify a girl getting naked and dancing even when u really dont giva a fuck.

22.)You and your friends share girls. (not me!!)

23.)You'll sleep with 1,000 blondes but you'll never marry one.

24.)You trim your chest hair with clippers and then move down south too!

25.)You have ever watched the slaying of a sheep.

26.)You rap along to DMX in Farsi.

27.)You take all your white friends out to eat kebab.

28.)Your hair is a fire hazard.

29.)You've been clubbing since you were 15.

30.)All your white friends think you're a Baller.

31.)You're parents are self-employed.

32.)Your cologne costs more than 50 dollars.

33.)You cruise to DC blasting Techno.

34.)You only vacation in Miami, LA, or Canada.

35.)You wear Armani and Versace...during the day.

36.)You dream about girls in Iran wanting a greencard.

37.)You own a Gold or Silver handmade Allah or Ali medallion. (Yes I do and proud of it!)
38.)Your last name ends in "i" "ian" or "oli".

39.)Your Armani pants don't fit you, but you wear them anyways.

40.)You think you're a DJ.

41.)Your friends nicknames end in "oush" or coos talah!.

42.)You refer to weed as Alaf!

43.) You hug and kiss relatives you have never seen before in your life.

44.)You wonder whether a cute girl is Persian and go up to ask her just to start a conversation.

45.)You rewind the movie Clueless to show your friends the Mafia part.

46.)White people are afraid of you because they know you will blow their house up.

47.)You find cow tongue appetizing.

48.)You have an Iranian friend with fake green or blue eyes.

49.)You always have a place to stay when you visit DC, Atlanta, Toronto, Dallas, or Santa Monica.

50.)You know Ali.

51.)You have to explain to white people that a visa is not a credit card.

52.)You can relate to more than three things on this list.

53.)You think of your crew as your family or Brothers.

54.)You send shout outs.

55.)Your parents think 12am is too late to stay out until your 21.

56.)You refer to your dads friends as Amoo!

57.)You order hot tea at Chili's.

58.)Your parents have a samovar.

59.)You have a Hookah as a centerpiece in your living room.

60.)You take dates out to Chelo kabob.

61.)You've heard of Moby Dicks.

62.)You have a Persian rug in every room.

63.)You have an endless supply of pistachios, dates, and figs.

64.)You go to Persian concerts for the falloudeh.

65.)You think Fruit Roll-Ups are bullshit.

66.)You know Lavashak is da bomb.

67.)You get pissed off when someone calls you an Arab.

69.)You actually like carbonated yogurt drinks.

70.)You've ever been in a fight because someone called you a camel jockey.

71.)You always pay the bill.

72.)You either tip 2% or 50% but never 15%.

73.)You dont pay for clubs because you know everyone.

74.)You only wear Adidas athletic wear.

75.)Your cell phone has a stupid-ass ring.

76.)Your grandmother insists you eat something every time you visit her.

77.)You refer to your group as Khodemuni.

78.)You're intramural team consists of all Persians and that one white guy.

79.)You name your pet Azzizam.

80.)You can get a hook-up almost anywhere you go.

81.)You have ever participated in tax evasion.

82.)You like Jay-Z's "Big Pimpin"

83.)You'll listen to anything but country music.

84.)Your parents say your becoming Americanized anytime you get into trouble.

85.)You know Samad is funnier than Jim Carrey.

86.) You're parents have been here for 20 years but they still say "I like dat von".

87.) You get mad when you see a Persian girl with a white boy because you know your keer is bigger.

88.) You say things like "It's all about being Persian!"--what?!?

89.) Your AOL screen name is a cute Persian word.

90.) You curse at your teachers or strangers in Farsi

91.) Your vocabulary when talking to your Persian friends only consists of the words "koon", "kos", or "keer".

92.) You know all the local Persian restaurants within a 30-mile radius of your house

93.) You flip out when someone mistakes you for a Mexican or Indian.

94.) You have to explain to all your friends that being Persian and Iranian are the same thing.

95.) You are hairy and damn proud of it.

96.) You have a lot of friends but you only take out your close ones.

97.) When you throw a party, people know about it before you get around to tell em cause they are soo off da hook.

98.) You often have these out cries of going fucking nuts.

99.) Your closest friend that you grew up with and trust with your life, is always your adopted Persian Brother. (coos talah)

100.) You go to Seas da bedar at Black Hills, play football all day, see all your old friends, and always!have the best time of your life!

If 10 of these apply to you  you are a normal Persian

If 15-19 of these apply to you- you are a Real Persian.

If 20-25 of these apply to you- you are a damn good Persian and have a lot of problems to sort out.

If 26-30 of these apply to you- than mother fucker your in the same boat as me and be damn proud. Cause aint no other Persian got love like meaint no Persian gonna dance to bandari. cause Persians are a tight ass family.